| DVD Review: The Human Tornado (1976) |
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| Written by The Projectionist |
| Wednesday, 21 September 2011 19:35 |
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I've often said that Dolemite was the reason for the phrase "What the Fuck?". Well, The Human Tornado is the reason they shortened the phrase to "WTF?". Saying the entire sentence just becomes a chore for as many times as you'll be uttering it while watching this drive-in blaxplotation "classic".
Meanwhile, Queen Bee (Lady Reed) is forced to close down her nightclub and bring her girls to work for her rival, the mobster Cavaletti (Herb Graham).
Dolemite makes his way to California to help Queen out. Wow, this sounds like they just used the script from "Dolemite" and made a few changes here and there to "keep it fresh".
Of course Dolemite sleeps with the mobsters nympho wife, who has some very weird fantasies about toy boxes and large black men.
Since you can't lie to the wang, she tells him where hubby is keeping a couple of Queen Bee's girls for collateral. Dolemite clobbers the guards at the hideout, in some fucked up fight scenes, I mean FUCKED up!, and rescues the girls from the torture chamber. They seem to be part of Dolemites "all girl army of kung-fu killers," as they kick some ass of their own. But much like Charlie's Angels, that didn't keep them from getting their lollipop asses caught!
Queen Bee and some of her girls are "entertaining" at Cavaletti's birthday party. They sneak some of Dolemite's men in, and the ass-kicking begins.
The cops show up, Cavaletti runs, and gets away from The Man, but winds up in THE MAN's clutches. Dolemite brings him back to the aforementioned torture chamber for a little genital chewing. By rats, I mean. The cops show up one more time and Dolemite splits. The country sheriff shows up and shoots him dead, or so he thinks, and drives away happy. Dolemite sits up, takes off his bulletproof vest and laughs about being the "Human Tornadah!"
End of freaky movie. This is not a bad movie, this is a movie where everybody is having a good time making it, and doesn't give a shit about little things like plot, acting, flubbed lines, or any of the other piddling crap. Take it for what it is, a fun movie to watch, put your brain in neutral, and enjoy the magnificence which is Rudy Ray Moore. Be sure to have at least a 12 pack, a fifth of your favorite adult beverage, or at least a nickle bag of, um, oregano for full enjoymentification.
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| Last Updated on Wednesday, 21 September 2011 21:52 |
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